Thursday, January 22, 2009

Mr. Hicks

I've been having trouble remembering my dreams lately and I rarely post anymore. I think it's because of stress. If there's too much stress in your life, you won't remember your dreams. Perhaps last night's dream could reveal at least one thing I'm stressed about.

It was short and bitter. I was in the kitchen of my mom's house. I was looking for something in the refrigerator. My mom walks in and I turn around. She says, "I have something to tell you..."
"Alright," I say.
"No, you already said you had something to tell me. So say it."
"Well.. I was gonna tell you later but... Steve died."

[Steve is a very good friend of mine and has been since I was 10. I just saw him a few days ago. He seemed fine.] I couldn't believe what she said. I was shell shocked. It didn't matter how he died.. just how I dealt with it. I started to breathe heavy and woke up breathing the same way.


Death: To dream about the death of a loved one, suggests that you are lacking a certain aspect or quality that the loved one embodies. Ask yourself what makes this person special or what do you like about him. It is that very quality that you are lacking in your own relationship or circumstances. Alternatively, it indicates that whatever that person represents has no part in your own life.

Mother: To see your mother in your dream, represents the nurturing aspect of your own character. Mothers offer shelter, comfort, life, guidance and protection. Some people may have problems freeing themselves from their mothers and are thus seeking their own individuality and development.
To dream that you are having a conversation with your mother, denotes a matter that has preoccupied your mind and you are not sure how to deal with it in your waking life. It indicates unresolved problems that still need to be worked out with your mother.

INTERPRETATION: A few nights ago, my girlfriend, Steve, and I went to Red Lobster. It was hard to get a word in. Steve is very social. He always has good things to say about me. I'm way too hard on myself and think otherwise. It's affected my self-perception horribly. I had had a long day, was in a bad mood, and kind of just wanted to crash when I got home. When we got back, my friend from out of town is there with his brother and none of my roommates were there to hang out with them. I wanted to see him.. but it was bad timing. Steve talked with them for awhile before they had to leave. I guess sometimes, especially lately, I've been missing that social spark. Not being able to make people feel good about themselves cause I don't feel too good about me. I've been too selfish. Perhaps that dream was to wake me up. I'll need more than that. When I become too confident sometimes.. I become an asshole and I don't want that. I have a lot of things to work on in my life before I make any big decisions about anything.